Why developing people doesn’t mean difficult conversations

I don’t think I'd ever tell any of my old bosses this.

But my lack of confidence affected the results I generated, more than anyone would know.

My surprising superpower was hiding my deeply seated lack of self-belief.

It’s been the biggest challenge of my life.

But even my closest friends wouldn’t tell you that.

Because I masterminded hiding it.

Over the years I realised I'm not the only one who can expertly cover it up.

It might just be the greatest skill we all have in common.

After all, who wants to step into the limelight and say “hey, look at me - you’re trusting me with hundreds of millions of dollars of business but I don’t even trust myself!”

It’s not a message many would enthusiastically communicate.

Because the truth is, it does impact your results.

Lack of confidence leads to timid decisions. It influences the conversations you have, the choices you make, the ideas you let yourself entertain.

I know I would have done things very differently had I felt the confidence I feel now.

Which is why I start the year writing to you with this: If you only do one thing to develop your people this year, focus on developing their confidence.

That doesn’t mean endless praise. That will do nothing but a temporary feel-good moment.

It means holding up the mirror to their brilliance.

Showing them over and over again not just where their results were strong, but why THEY were able to deliver those results.

The qualities that they brought to the table that generated these specific outcomes.

Be specific.

Confidence comes not from what you do (your achievements), but from who you are (your qualities).

Few people can see what they are great at. They are so used to it … it’s been with them their whole life. They take them for granted and unconsciously diminish the importance of these qualities in their ability to deliver strong results.

“Doesn’t everyone do that?”

I’ve heard it so many times from high performing clients who take themselves for granted.

“No, they don't. But you do, seemingly effortlessly.”

You need to show people what makes them stand out.

Use your positional power as CEO to encourage them to listen to you.

Tell them - then ask them questions so they can’t overlook what you just said. It’s a fundamental human truth that negative feedback sticks like velcro whilst positive feedback slides off like teflon.

Encourage your people to talk about how great they are.

It doesn’t mean they don’t have areas to develop.

It means they have a foundation to develop from.

The more confident your team are the more innovative their thinking will be. The more autonomy they will choose. The bigger calculated risks they will be willing to take on. The less likely they are to burn out. The more focused they will be on what really matters.

I could go on and on about the benefits. Confidence is infectious. If you’re not feeling it, find a way to go beyond the limitations of low self-belief. Everyone can - I say that from my own personal experience as it’s one of the biggest demons I have faced in my life, and I have also seen the benefits when my clients have chosen to seek an experience beyond imposter syndrome and the subsequent impact that has on their entire life experience.

If nothing - do it for your people.

Find ways to help them embrace and understand their brilliance.

This is the starting point - and it’s available to you right here, right now.